Unlike yesteryears, when being a single parent was fate, these days, it is a choice for many. However, this form of parenting comes with its own set of problems. But that does not necessarily mean that these problems have no solution. Aside from all of the issues, it has its charm, filled with fun-filled moments with your bundle of joy. The biggest part is that you know it is a big challenge for you, and if you are successfully able to address these challenges, life can be gratifying.
So, let us find out the various problems of single parenting, the multiple solutions that you can adopt, and above all few consequences of bringing up a child or children alone.
Jonah Engler identifies factors that pose to be limiting factors
There are a couple of factors that prove to be hindrances or at least pose to be hiccups in bringing up children single-handedly.
One of the biggest challenges that single parents face is dealing with finances. You have to bring up your child, and at the same time, you have to make a living. So, balancing work and parenting can take a toll on your health. And if you have to put in long hours at work with a toddler back at home, it might get quite stressful, and you end up suffering from anxiety and apprehensions.
- Being lonely
As compared to your life before being a single parent, when you had more freedom to enjoy, and you could hang out with friends, relax, and unwind, the moment you become a single parent, you take on the onus of bringing up a child single-handedly. So, you will have fewer phone calls to receive, or you will find that you are not able to catch up with your near and dear ones too often.
If you had your spouse to help you out with household chores or helping with the school work and studies, you could relax for a while because you would have shared the responsibilities. However, bringing up a child all by yourself might lead to fatigue, especially if you have to do the same things daily for months and perhaps years.
However, you can overcome this if you occasionally plan small outings and trips to the zoo or if you have a grown-up child, you can plan for a movie. It will ensure that you do not burn out.
If you fall sick or your child becomes ill, seeking medical assistance, taking your children or child to the hospital or clinic, and getting adequate treatment promptly can be overwhelming. That is another challenge.
Jonah Engler, who is a well-known philanthropist and engages in several social aid activities, invests his time, resources, and extends financial aid to the needy. However, an essential aspect that he always emphasizes is that the individual receiving help must understand the value of the assistance they are getting.
Aside from the above challenges, few other hiccups that a single parent might face are as follows-
- Instilling good habits and discipline in your kids
The problem starts when it comes to teaching values, ethics, discipline, and good manners to your children or child. Often, this is an area where you might find it even more challenging because of the stress caused by social set-up. When your kids see that their friends have their father and mother to bring them up and they get attention from both parents, your kids might find it challenging to cope up with the vacuum present in their lives.
You might become a single parent not just by choice, but it might so happen that you have gone through a painful marital separation, or your spouse might have succumbed to specific illness or accident. When a child is young, these are a few things that they find difficult to come to terms with.
However, if this condition is due to divorce, then you can always talk it out with your spouse of sharing the responsibilities. If not for every little thing but at least to spend time with your child frequently so that they do not feel the lacuna and can handle life much better and mentally are at par with their friends that are living with both parents.
If not for yourself, at least in the interest of your children, you must decide about spending equal time.
- Self-esteem nosedive
There are still people in the society that will look down upon your single parenting ideologies without understanding your situation or the circumstances that led to your condition. However, you must remember that bringing up a child single-handedly is a big challenge, and not everyone can deal with such a situation. So, in other words, you are a fighter and a “one-man” army.
To avoid people that pull you down or bother too much about your self-respect, avoid interacting with such people. You can surround yourself with people that understand where you stand and how strong and positive minded you are to bring up your child all by yourself.
If you are not confident enough, you can take up the challenge of engaging yourself in a social activity or work towards social responsibility programs. By doing so, your child will be confident that aside from bringing him up, his mother also has the strength to work for a larger cause. And this very thought can be a driving force for your child not just in his growing up days but also when he becomes self-sufficient.
Today these are many resources available that single parents can make the most of. Whether it is for their kids, their mental health or their own well being they have the option to choose the best for them. If time and resources permit, they can be part of philanthropic activities that aims to give back to the community. So whether you are a single father or mother make the most of the situation.