Have you ever been wondering whether or not you did the right thing by enrolling in this particular field of expertise when applying to college?
Great, so have I.
It’s a scary thought — have I chosen wisely?
Years ago when I was applying to college, I let my heart lead me.
I chose Slavic Linguistics with the clear idea that maybe, just maybe, I might be having trouble finding a decent job to sustain my independent lifestyle.
I could have chosen differently — I could have thrown myself into the world of economics, business, entrepreneurship, science. With a bit of luck and tons of hard work, I could have landed a job that would, essentially, take care of all my spendings.
But I headed to the opposite direction
As I was making my mind on my future, I remember thinking about my inner passion. Surely, it was leading me towards words. Books. Sentences. Love. I spent a week trying to figure out the proper answer to the never-ending question out there — the one that haunts us at night:
Should I follow my mind or my heart?
So, staying true to myself and my constant romanticizing of the world, I went with words. With books. With faith in choices.
After graduation, I had to choose again
I had a chance of starting working at a local logistics company. My first thought was:
Hell! What am I supposed to do there? Do I know anything about logistics? Do I even care about trucks?
The thing was this — I wanted to start living on my own terms and move out of my parents’ home. I’ve decided it’s about time I begin building a life of my own. Given the fact that the job offered to coach me as a newbie, this time I’ve decided to follow my mind for a change. So I said ‘Yes’ and spent four years there, thinking of how I’m wasting my time.
The job did indeed pay the rent, but I was in debt to my heart
As the days went by, I became to realize that mornings weren’t so fun anymore — I was slowly losing my spark day after day, a cup of coffee after a cup of coffee, getting ready to step right into a world my heart didn’t belong to.
I’ve put writing aside. Words didn’t come to me as they used to. I read rarely, my mind began entering this loop of daily repetition. But, most importantly, I didn’t feel myself anymore.
Sure, the money was okay. I’ve met some great people there. From the outside, I looked like someone who was getting their shit together knowing exactly what they are doing while staying on the right track.
From the inside, I was a mess
I missed the moments when my heart raced a bit when publishing a piece. I missed the evenings when I used to think of topics to cover up next. I simply missed aligning my heart with my mind — and I most certainly acknowledged that this was the essence of life after all.
It’s okay to take a slight detour, but have no fear in also taking sharp turns
Of course, I quit. Eventually, I chose my heart again and, to my surprise, witnessed something extraordinary: by following your heart you are getting closer to reuniting it with your mind and thus achieving inner peace.
It’s only natural for a person to experiment and try out different things and approaches. It’s even a must, to put it this way — by taking detours you come to realizations of what’s truly important to you.
If I had never put myself in a situation where I felt I didn’t belong to the job I was doing, perhaps I would have never realized the importance of writing and words in my life in order to be happy and fulfilled.
So be brave — follow your heart, embrace detours down the road and always, always head back home.
Previously published on Medium.com.
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