Marriage can mean different things to different people. Some might feel it is all about new beginnings whereas others might consider it as an end of their freedom. And, to be honest, both sides could be either right or wrong depending on the situation. It’s just a matter of perception. What’s important is to have a realistic view of marriage. However, a lot of women approach marriage with certain fixed notions and misconceptions, which can lead to dissatisfaction in their marriage or frequent marital discords. Here are a few such marriage misconceptions that women often have:
Living A Fairy Tale
Blame it on those mushy fairy tales we were fed as a child because most young women believe that marriage is their true ‘happily ever after.’ They assume that their Prince Charming will marry them and keep them like a princess – meaning a life of complete luxury. However, the reality is that there may be lows in life as well. And when that happens, someone with a glossy picture of marriage can easily crumble.
The Husband Is Superior
In our patriarchal society, women are drilled with this idea that after father or brother, a woman’s husband is her only protector and savior. This immediately creates a superior image of the husband in a woman’s mind. She assumes that after marriage it is her duty to obey her husband, no matter how irrational or illogical he is. At times, this very misconception is misused by the husband or his immediate relatives to exploit a naive woman.
Family Above Everything
Agreed we love our parents and siblings. However, some women go to the extent of prioritizing them over their personal lives after marriage. You need to understand that your relationship with your spouse requires equal, if not more, attention. Your family knows you for a certain number of years already. But it is your spouse with whom you still need to bond with. This will help you build the foundation of love, trust, and understanding. This unfair tilting of scales in favor of your family can spell doom for your marriage. So, balance it well.
No Friends After Marriage
“Forget your friends. You’re married now!” We often hear these words not only from a woman’s in-laws but also from her own family. Women are made to believe that once they are married, they need to give up their old lifestyle, including their friends. It’s completely unfair to put such conditions on a person to give up something they’ve grown up with for the best part of their lives. Women should have as much right to have a thriving social life for themselves. Because as we grow old, this is the only social support we can fall back on.
Husband Is The Breadwinner
Whether willingly or forcefully, most women believe that they’ll eventually end up giving their careers or jobs after marriage. Why? Because the husband is the breadwinner. Despite women becoming achievers in various fields and contributing equally to family finances, the archaic belief is still piled upon them. To continue their jobs/careers or give it up should be a woman’s personal decision rather than a forced one. Giving up your financial independence for a relationship like marriage is a big misconception.
“Mrs. So & So; And Mother Of….”
Yes, being a mother and a wife are important relationships to identify with. But making them your ‘only’ identity is not right. A woman is as much an independent, intelligent person as the rest of her family members. There is no rule that you should lose your individuality after tying the not. And let not anyone make you believe otherwise.
Marriage is a beautiful and secure relationship which is built on the foundation of trust, reliability, and love. It also requires hard work, compromises, and sacrifices too. However, all of these need not come from one person alone. Only when both partners in this union contribute equally can this relationship thrive forever!